Tuesday, July 13, 2010

blame game

So after reading about yet another star's "touching story" as they "came out" about bipolar and the struggle they had and the problems and difficulties it had caused them, the poor decision's they had made because of bipolar, and what a fucked up person they were and the evil mean shit that they did because of it ...blah blah fucking blah .... now im all for stars coming out and sharing their difficulties with the disorder and helping "educate" the general public

... BUT GET THE FUCK REAL AND STOP USING IT AS A DAMNED EXCUSE FOR EVERY CRAPPY MEAN EVIL STUPID THING YOU EVER DID... MAN THE FUCK UP GROW SOME BALLS AND ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY... by whining complaining bitching and blaming every wrong thing in your life on bipolar YOUR NOT FUCKING HELPING.... your just pissing people off and helping to give folk the fodder they need to be prejudice against bipolar
does bipolar cause us to make wrong decisions ... hell yes .. but not every bad decision we make in our entire lives is down to bipolar ... and even the ones that are, ultimately it is still, in actual fact us that are making that final decision...

was i the evil bitch from hell screaming at you to get the fuck out of my life and give me some dammed space.. GO ON GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU SMOTHERING CLOYING ASSHOLE..? yes it was i ..... would i of said it had i not been bipolar.. id like to think i wouldn't but hell if i was in a bad enough mood possibly ... did bipolar make me say it ? NO ... it assisted in helping me to choose to say it, but ultimately i made the choice....

im also the idiot that made the other choice of not telling you i was prone to periods of time where i really couldn't handle company.. i am also the idiot that didn't tell you i was heading into one of those spells and im the idiot that neglected to mention little signs that you could watch out for incase i, for one reason or another, missed the signs myself....bipolar had no hand in any of those decision...

really sorry i called you cloying asshole but i am an idiot and i am unused to people being so caring, and quite frankly it scared the crap out of me... if you forgive me i will now tell you the information you need to know so we can prevent this happening again .... NOT im sorry it wasn't me it was the bipolar...BECAUSE THATS BULLSHIT.. it helped but it did not make the decision.

(no political comment intended here i just liked the cartoon, and ignore the who and it fits well)

of course should we decide that were willing to take the risk on whether or not we can fly, chances are we might not be around to apologize to the clean up crew or relatives and friends who we have put through extreme distress.. sorry about that

yes there are things we cant control... crap memory makes any form of birth control short of sterilization next to impossible for a lot of us, i found out the hard way ..I.U.D's not a good choice when you have a real bad memory .. sure sounds like great idea at the time... get back to me a year later when you forgot it was in there, or you didn't realize that much time had passed and its embedded into your flesh... unless you have family/friends that are brave enough to endure your bipolar ass and remind you its time to see gynecologist again.. or remind you to look at the note you wrote yourself to remind yourself to book a gynecologist appointment.....thats all going to be hit and miss (the depo injection seems safest option if youcan get it). good luck with that one and im not being sarcastic when i say that.

meetings, appointments, birthdays, anniversaries and so on lets face it were going to miss some. all we can do is plaster the house with giant post its and hope to hell we remember to notice them or program the phone and hope we remembered to recharge it

ultimately it is up to us to ensure that we don't allow ourselves to fall prey to the temptations of bipolar in the actions that we can control .. and that includes not allowing ourselves to use it as an easy excuse. if we cant trust ourselves to watch what we say to people under a given phase ... STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM PEOPLE DURING THAT PHASE, or avoid long conversations if we cant manage to go into isolation ... if we slip up apologize, explain, and for christ sake give the poor sod the information they need to avoid getting into that situation again.

if were prone to over spending ... DON'T GO SHOPPING in a manic high... put your check books/cash either in the care of a trusted person or some where that is so dammed inconvenient that chances are the urge to buy what ever the fuck we saw on tv 5 mins ago has passed. pre plan your shopping list and take only that amount with you in cash.

if meds work for you get on them and use what ever works for you to remind you to take them as often as possible.

if you have a particularly close friend ask them to help.. friends can often spot what we miss in our behavior....wid0w you seem to be getting slightly irritable lately are you heading into a downward spiral? W.T.F HOW DARE YOU IM NOT FUCKING IRRITABLE..... ohh wait yes i am thank you for pointing that out to me i can now take the necessary precautions...


  1. Which star was it that came out as bipolar?


  2. take your pick they are coming out of the woodwork lately, i dont know if im just catching more celeb news or if there is some "fashion" statement going on in celeb planet

    even non diagnosed ones are jumping on some sort of demented bandwagon, and when the celebs them selfs arnt the reporters are playing lets guess whos got it game.

    footballers/b listers/has beens

    some celebs are trying really hard to raise awareness in a constructive manner and its such a shame to see the others messing with that

    ohh if your into the star thing you might like these links



  3. At last another bipolar person who takes responsibility. I'm so sick of seeing and hearing "I'm bipolar, I can't help it". I manically spent this month now I have to pay it back. Why did I do it? Because I let myself, yes bipolar makes it harder for me to control my spending and because of that I sometimes get carried away but I know the signs and I watched items on ebay for days, long enough to request help but I didn't. My fault!

  4. i tend to over compensate on the spend thrift part and partner has difficult time getting me to spend on anything ...(lol iv just gotten a muttered aint that the bloody truth from him" mainly because im way to aware of where my spending can lead.